My Release
by Tysoyo Kalli
Summary: There is always reasons why someone does something to release their constant pain... Another Raphael fic.


Author:KallitheINfamous  
  
Title: Release  
  
Warning: eh.. OOCness on people's part. Yeah... mild swearing I think. And bad spelling gallor!  
  
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He opened his dusty ice blue eyes and looked around the room. It was dark and rather cold. The sheets around him where cool to the touch. He closed his eyes for a moment more trying to go back to sleep. To feel that numbness that is when your subcontious mind is at work. He felt the bed shift slightly next to him. He opened his eyes again and realized where he really was. He turned his head, blonde hair falling over his eyes to see a girl's sleeping face. It was quiet, peaceful, and rather beautiful.  
  
A sicking feeling fell in his stomach as he looked at the girl. She shifted again and sighed heavily. He brushed some of the blonde hair from his eyes as he stared at her face. It was well rounded and sweet. He had seen many faces almost like this one. Only every one was slightly different in its own respects. This face had a small nose and rather pouty lips. He sighed and rolled over onto his other side so not to look at that face again. Though like all the others it was eatched into his memorie forever. Knowing that he dirtied her. Knowing that she had fallen for his small lies. Like all the others. She would forever be just a face he could and would recall in the future later on in his never ending life. Or else thats what it felt like. Never ending.  
  
He sat up slowly and pulled his knees up to his chest. He looked around the cheap motel room. It was small and dirty. Like all the others. Nothing different. Raphael sighed and got out of bed to search for his clothing. He did not want to be around when the girl, who's name he could not recall very well at the moment, woke up. Almost fully dressed he turned to look at her one last time. /Blonde hair./ He smirked. /Long blonde hair and sweet eyes. A perfect body and good at being a toy./ Thats what his mind processed sharply.  
  
He walked out of the room and into the night air still buttening up his dark blue shirt. Raphael pushed his hair out of his eyes and tried to figure out where the other motel room was. He walked down the cold, wet street his eyes glued to the ground.  
  
Raphael's eyes settled on Michael's narrow face once the door was opened. The red haired kid smirked at him, spitting out the obvious, "Had fun fucking around?"  
  
The tall blonde's eyebrow twitched slightly, as he pushed Michael out of the way. He needed to take a shower, thats what his mind was telling him.  
  
Maybe to remove the girl's sent still clinging to his body. Or to try to scrub away what he was. A disgusting pig. Raphael was not in the mood for Michael's attitude. And Earth was just getting under his skin. It made it crawl at times whenever he thought about it.  
  
He proceded to remove his coat and walk towards the bathroom. Small and a disgusting yellow, with white shinning threw it trying to scream that it once long ago was clean. He started the water and noticed how deathly cold it was.  
  
Sighing the blonde stood up and spun around, water still running and went hunting for the cigarette. Not that it did much, it just tasted good and gave him a slight high when he really needed it. He could feel Michael's eyes glareing at him bitterly. But he was still unfazed. Over the many years he has developed up a tolerance of thoughs blood thirsty glares.  
  
Michael huffed something bitter, and plopped on the bed and switching the comptration called a television on. The annoying sound of clapping sounded in the air, as a game show host reported what had just happened. Raphael looked around the room, his expression falling into the almost ever present expression he always seemed to hold. An expression that stated coldly, 'I. Dont. Care.'  
  
The cigarette tasted disgustingly sweet as the blonde inhaled the fumes. He let out the cloud of smoke as he felt the nicotine flowing threw his vains.  
  
'You could say its an addiction. Much like this cigarette that you hold in your own hands. Always wanting it. Always needing it.' A voice in the back of Raphael's mind said plainly as he headed back towards the bathroom unbuttoning his shirt, and stealing a glance at Michael sprawled out on the bed.  
  
Legs wide apart, hands behind his head. Only clad in some shorts. His boots still applied to his body. So small and simple. Tight and compact. The red tossed hair and long rat tail sliding down his named shoulder across that dreadfully beautiful dragon tattoo.  
  
Raphael still did not, after all these years together, understand what drove the boy onwards? After everything was taken, and thrown back in his face.  
  
The show of the television flashed in his light, minicing green eyes. Raphael did prefer the green to the amber they changed to. The blonde vaugely remembered his bath running as he was cought staring at Michael.  
  
The red head turned sharply, eyes grazing over Raphael, reading everything there was to the tall blue eyed man. If you could call him a man at all....  
  
"What the hell you staring at?!" Michael hissed.  
  
What was he staring at anyways? Anything in paticular? Not that he knew of. Raphael smirked then shruged and continued onto his shower.  
  
The bed was warm, but not hot. And not comfortable enough to fall asleep to. Leaving his mind to wander to past and future events. And none of it really mattering to him. Michael snored lightly in his bed, clonked out where he fell when Raphael left for his shower.  
  
The shower that could never cleance his disgusting body. He wondered if there was a way for an angel to truely die. If that was even possiable. He knew that several angels have tried for suicide, but it hardly ever works.  
  
He was on his back, hands behind his head, his thoughts floating on the many ways he could try to die. He could jump out and not open his wings to catch his fall. Stab himself in the vital organs and maybe preform open heart seargery on his own self. Or he could slit is throat, but from what he had heard, that was just something really painful to fix.  
  
And what would happen to him if he DID die? Would people actually miss the great doctor, the disgusting womanizer? Would that be even ~possiable~?! Michael wouldn't give a fuck, and no one else liked him enough to care.  
  
Raphael threw the covers off, unable to sleep at all. No big suprise, to quiet, except the small content snores coming from the red haired archangel. He slowly made his way to the bathroom's sink. though it wasnt truely in the bathroom, more outside and to the left. He turned on the cold water and cuped his hands, catching the water droplets. His hands filled then the water's content was to great and it spilled vengefully over.  
  
He spashed his face with the water again. The water giving him a prickly feelings over his skin as it touched his face. He looked up at the dusty blue eyes, dull and uncaring. Dead. Nothing in them. Not a thing.  
  
He reached for a towl and dabbed his face. He stood up and closed his eyes sighing. He removed the slightly sented towl from his face and opened his eyes and procceded to his bed.  
  
He flipped on one light and looked around. Michael groaned abit and sat up rubbing his eyes. From the profile view presented to Raphael, he looked so much like a child. Still unaged by time. And with the tattoo gone, it showed what beauty lyed beneith. Michael growled, he did not enjoy being awoken to bright lights sounding threw the half dark room. Not that Raphael minded the fact that he would probly be pounced and probly hit. Or, to be more reasonable, be glared into the ground or else cussed to no dieing end. But as Raphael thought, he didnt really care.  
  
"Why the hell did you do that?! I was ~sleeping~ you shit brain!!" Michael growled lowly, turning to face Raphael. His eyes that inbetween state of green and amber.  
  
Raphael sighed and leaned forward on his legs closing his eyes to the world, "Couldn't sleep and didn't want to be in the dark."  
  
"So you had to fucking wake me up, right?! Because your afraid of the damn dark right?!" Michael snarled sitting up fully turning his body completly to face Raphael. Murder written all over the sharp features of the angel.  
  
The blonde glanced up at the red haired boy sitting infront of him. He wasn't that angry at him, for his breathing wasn't to heavy. The way Michael's eyes burned made Raphael wonder how much he really cared and couldn't let himself show that he cared.  
  
The blue eyed moster brushed his hair back behind his ear in annoyance. He was sick of seeing the pale yellow color day in day out. Year after year. He could feel his eyes narrowing at Michael. For some reason he felt hatred towards everything suddenly.  
  
Raphael wondered what Michael was thinking. What he saw. Something horriably disgusting and positivly something to hang on to? Because he was used to being used or something?  
  
"Yes..." Raphael said softly standing up. Assiah was getting under his skin as he walked about the curt little room. There was nothing to it. Nothing great about it. He suddenly wanted to hit something. To beat it up. But the opritunity passed by quickly as Michael was up on his feet as well, stomping towards Raphael.  
  
"Yes?! Is that ALL your going to SAY?! YES?! YES to WHAT?!" Michael snarled angerly. Raphael shrugged his shoulders, feeling very tired again.  
  
Michael was a bit angry. But that didn't matter to the blonde. At least not at this moment. It didn' matter that he was pressed up against the bed, Michael hoving over him.  
  
No not at this point. Nothing mattered when you reached here. You are disgusting and unwanted. Unfaithful and untrue.  
  
Where is the edge of sanity? Can you tell when you go over the 'deep end'? Michael's weight was on him, then off of him. Raphael couldn't tell what was going on. He wanted out of this stuffy room. It smelled of mildew and hate. If hate had a smell.  
  
He was up and on his feet, glaring at Michael who sat steaming, huddled slightly, legs crossed and with this adorably pissed expression plastered to his face. Raphael dressed quickly, not paying any attention to the red haired boy sitting.  
  
Soon, but not soon enough, Raphael was out into the air again, crisp and thick. Nothing like what he was used to. Car fumes, and oil with the disgusting factories in the back ground. But, it was still fresh air.  
  
He began to walk ignoring the tiredness. He knew what he wanted, what he longed for. That small escape from reality. That someone could help him with. Yes... he knew exactly what to look for.  
  
Slim waist, perfect body and a over made up face. But none the less a beautiful being. She hovered over him, smiling down at him. Yes... his release was soon. And now just the primal wanting for that release takes him over. To become unbearable... and to fully control him. 


End file.
